Today was officially the first day of school for Ellie. Although it was only a one hour orientation for students and parents, it counted as her first day. Tomorrow comes the real test... for mommie and daddy. It is the first drop off day. She will be there from 8:30 until Noon. Naturally, Paige is feeling quite a bit of anxiety about the whole situation. I, too, am feeling it. My mind, however, continuously recirculates the question, "Have we done enough?"
Starting out, the questions were rather mundane. Can Ellie recognize and write both upper and lower case letters? Can she count high enough and identify numbers? These were rather selfish questions. They speak directly to how much we, as parents, did encouraging her and working with her in her first 5 years.
Then the questions started getting a little more serious. Will this most important teacher, her kindergarten teacher, treat her the way she should be treated? Will she love Ellie and truly do her level best to instill a positive school experience? Will her classmates be kind to her? Have we taught her to share and play well with others?
Then came the big ones. Have we raised Ellie to at least have a basic understanding of who Jesus is and who He wants to be in her life? Have we told her enough times just how much Jesus loves her? Have we instilled in her the need to "love her neighbors as herself?" How much retraining will I have to do when her faith is challenged by "academia?"
I know, I know, I could go crazy hypothesizing, questioning and bouncing all this around in my head, but that is just me. When I step back and take a broader view, I realize I am at the place where faith converges with life. I can stand on the word of God and quote all the "train up a child" verses, but it is at times like this that one really comes to grips with giving up that which one cherishes most into the Hands of the One who cherishes her the most. I can live with that.
Wasn't it easier when all we worried about was if they were going to sleep all night and if they could roll over? What happened to our babies??
ReplyDeleteBe proud- Ellie is a great little girl!
Well, Tiger.....I wish I could say it gets easier, but it hasn't for me. Each year the worries are different, but they are there just the same. One tradition we started on "Day 1" of kindergarten was praying out loud every morning on the way to school. I have cherished that morning tradition for the past 11 years. We only have a few more mornings left to do that (Hunter will be driving himself as of Oct), but I hope he'll remember to say that daily prayer every morning on his own drive to school. I know it has been a precious blessing for me!
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